Amazing how quickly deadlines start to loom, isn't it?
My current focus has been to develop and complete a suitable story for an anthology that has a deadline of September first. I have started five stories since receiving this assignment, finishing two. The second one I finished exceeded the word count specification by approximately 3,000 words and I'm not entirely sure I can squeeze it down until it fits (at least and keep the same feeling). The first was so bad, that I printed it out and jumped up and down on it, allowing myself some choice imprecations while doing so. The other three all have promise...just like the first two did, and September keeps marching closer with October right behind.
Funny thing...before I got the invite, I had just written a pair of really cool little stories with hardly any effort. The delight expressed by my usual ring of readers surprised me. Since then, however, I seem to be spinning around a bit.
I mentioned this to Lars last night in AIM, and that pretty much set the stage to speak about the ebb and flow of inspiration here in the blog.
There are times when you can do no wrong. They are extremely rare, but they do occur. I had one soaring season like that when, for my skill level, I was flying extremely well. All the soaring trophies that adorn the wall of my office harken to that season. The same sort of thing can happen with writing, especially when you're trying too hard.
The nature of the beast is one of ebb and flow, surge and regression. Creativity takes time, effort, and focus. So it is only natural to have a "down" slope after finishing a work, no matter how small. I imagine that the more professional one becomes, the more shallow the "dips", but I suspect the roller coaster is still there to some degree.
I can feel the bands loosening. Immediately after the invites I was too wired to think straight then I went into "panic and doubt" mode. Now things are settling into "I can do this." I can finish what I start, which is a fundamental tenet of the Zette School of Writing. Then I can edit.
I can do this. So can you.
Tuesday, July 26, 2005
Thursday, July 21, 2005
Writing, Creativity, and the Duality of Writer Mentality
Wow. I haven't posted since May 16? Ouch. Guess I need to fix that.
First off, some news: The Illuminated Manuscript E-book antho from Dragon Tooth Fantasy (Double Dragon E-Books) comes out in August. My story, Hell Forge, is in the collection. When it comes out, I'll be doing some promotional work. I have also been invited to submit to two anthos that will come out in 2006, so I actually have a chance to garner some pro sales soon.
Okay, onto more writerly topics. I've had several things tumbling around in my cabasa lately. One of these subjects is related to trying too hard. See, with a little bit of success comes a tendency to start to get a bit cocky, and when you get cocky, you increase the odds of screwing up exponentially.
I tripped over that recently. What's worse, I snippetted a bit of what I was doing to Julie C's board. When I woke up from my delusions, I started banging my head against my desk for displaying my ineptitude to the world. I'd show you what set all this off, but I've edited the text to the point that it's not quite as bad as first, so it doesn't have the same "ick" factor.
Anyway, I fell back into my old habits of stilted, overly complex sentences full of very fancy words. I also did a lot of telling instead of showing. In my own defense, I will admit that I had been perusing Fantasy and Science Fiction and Strange Horizons the day before, and had succumbed to "lit-raw-airy" influences.
Where is this heading? Ah, toward the odd duality that writers have to balance in their heads. We must be both our own best promoters while simultaneously being harshly critical. Beware the writer who has become convinced that golden prose flows from their fingertips at will. Also, watch to see that your own mind does not bend that direction. The converse of this, of course, is not to be so severe on your own writing that you do not show it to others.
There's that balance concept again.
In my case, the garnering of the antho invites has set off an odd convulsion in my writing. I'm incredibly excited to have been sponsored and presented as a potential talent, and that is a real confidence boost. Unfortunately, I cannot afford such confidence. I have to remain critical of myself. I can't start believing that I'm too good, too soon. I've made several stabs at shorts for the anthos, and they have all failed to pass initial muster. That doesn't mean they can't, it means that by the strange duality of writerdom I suddenly feel inadequate to the task as my earlier overconfidence quavers in the face of immediate reality.
I don't do schizophrenia well. Sorry. I only have one mind and I have to run it at pretty much full throttle just to get by on a calm day.
The conclusion that comes across is this: you have to do your best, and you have to not let the speed bumps completely unhinge your confidence. You have to keep writing or it's over. If you let the hiccups stop your efforts then you have no chance of ever getting better.
So, I suspect the "duality" isn't actually there. A writer writes, as Zette is fond of saying. An author uses a critical eye to edit what has been written. Once the editing is done, the manuscript is submitted, then submitted again, and again, and again. When it finally sells, then the author must drag out confidence and promote the work tirelessly and vociferously, because no one else is going to do it for you.
That's the truth of getting published: there's always something else to do, and every job requires a different mind set.
First off, some news: The Illuminated Manuscript E-book antho from Dragon Tooth Fantasy (Double Dragon E-Books) comes out in August. My story, Hell Forge, is in the collection. When it comes out, I'll be doing some promotional work. I have also been invited to submit to two anthos that will come out in 2006, so I actually have a chance to garner some pro sales soon.
Okay, onto more writerly topics. I've had several things tumbling around in my cabasa lately. One of these subjects is related to trying too hard. See, with a little bit of success comes a tendency to start to get a bit cocky, and when you get cocky, you increase the odds of screwing up exponentially.
I tripped over that recently. What's worse, I snippetted a bit of what I was doing to Julie C's board. When I woke up from my delusions, I started banging my head against my desk for displaying my ineptitude to the world. I'd show you what set all this off, but I've edited the text to the point that it's not quite as bad as first, so it doesn't have the same "ick" factor.
Anyway, I fell back into my old habits of stilted, overly complex sentences full of very fancy words. I also did a lot of telling instead of showing. In my own defense, I will admit that I had been perusing Fantasy and Science Fiction and Strange Horizons the day before, and had succumbed to "lit-raw-airy" influences.
Where is this heading? Ah, toward the odd duality that writers have to balance in their heads. We must be both our own best promoters while simultaneously being harshly critical. Beware the writer who has become convinced that golden prose flows from their fingertips at will. Also, watch to see that your own mind does not bend that direction. The converse of this, of course, is not to be so severe on your own writing that you do not show it to others.
There's that balance concept again.
In my case, the garnering of the antho invites has set off an odd convulsion in my writing. I'm incredibly excited to have been sponsored and presented as a potential talent, and that is a real confidence boost. Unfortunately, I cannot afford such confidence. I have to remain critical of myself. I can't start believing that I'm too good, too soon. I've made several stabs at shorts for the anthos, and they have all failed to pass initial muster. That doesn't mean they can't, it means that by the strange duality of writerdom I suddenly feel inadequate to the task as my earlier overconfidence quavers in the face of immediate reality.
I don't do schizophrenia well. Sorry. I only have one mind and I have to run it at pretty much full throttle just to get by on a calm day.
The conclusion that comes across is this: you have to do your best, and you have to not let the speed bumps completely unhinge your confidence. You have to keep writing or it's over. If you let the hiccups stop your efforts then you have no chance of ever getting better.
So, I suspect the "duality" isn't actually there. A writer writes, as Zette is fond of saying. An author uses a critical eye to edit what has been written. Once the editing is done, the manuscript is submitted, then submitted again, and again, and again. When it finally sells, then the author must drag out confidence and promote the work tirelessly and vociferously, because no one else is going to do it for you.
That's the truth of getting published: there's always something else to do, and every job requires a different mind set.
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